Chapter 25: Pipsqueak


Trigger Warnings: ableism


On Monday, Paige has the first normal day he's had in quite some time.

For almost the entirety of yesterday, Leaf spent time in the driver’s seat. Them and Brandon had decided to get to know each other a little better, so Paige mostly slept.

But now Paige was ready to be here and present.

Him and Brandon rode to school together, having a great time to boot. One time after a really hard laugh, he catches his mom’s reflection in the rear view mirror. She’s smiling so wide it must hurt.

Paige mimics her, equally as happy.

“Have a good day, sweeties!” Quinn waves after they arrive at the school. “And good luck with your tests!”

“Thanks, Mom!” Paige says at the same time as Brandon says, “Thanks, Tía Quinn!”

She drives off shortly after, leaving the two teens to enter the building with the rest of the students.

They don’t get far into the school before they hear a, “Paige!” and the sound of running.

The two teens spin around, only for Paige to immediately be encased in a soft hug.

“Oh!” he smiles. “Hello, OJ!”

“Hello!” OJ smiles too, pulling back. “Sorry for the sudden hug, I feel like I haven’t seen you in forever!”

Paige laughs. “It has been a good minute!”

“It’s actually been about a week!” OJ corrects with a kind smile.

Paige doesn’t have it in him to explain what he meant, melting a little bit at how… OJ the other was.

“It has!” he laughs instead. “It’s really good to see you again.”

“Likewise!”

“Oh, dude,” Brandon says suddenly. “Your shoe’s untied.”

“Oh no!” Paige gasps. “Hold on, I’ll fix it right now.”

He bends down and sets to work. Above him though, he can see Brandon and OJ move closer together. It sounds like they’re saying something, but with all the racket in the hallway, it’s impossible to tell what they’re talking about. By the time Paige has stood back up, they’re back to their original positions.

“Were you two talking about something?” he asks, head tilted.

“No!” OJ says a little too quickly for it to be the truth. Brandon rolls his eyes.

“I was trying to see if he’d give me some pointers on the test.” he pouts. “But no dice. Right, OJ?” he asks, ribbing the other.

“Um!” OJ starts, stiff. “Y-yes! That’s exactly what we were talking about!”

Paige hums. “It’s probably best we don’t cheat anyways,” he says sagely.

“Maybe for you, buddy,” Brandon laughs. “But for me? Oh boy, I could use any help I can get.”

“And you won’t be getting it from me!” OJ giggles. “Ah, but the bell should be ringing soon. I’ll see you all a bit later, yes?”

“Yep!” Paige smiles. “I think we only get about 2 hours to finish…”

“We get about 3, actually,” Brandon corrects. “Our IEP’s, remember?”

“Oh yeah!” Paige nods. “I still don’t know why I have one of those…”

“Eh, who cares?” Brandon shrugs. “More time, less problems, right?”

“I guess so!” Paige nods.

The bell rings.

“Oh, we gotta get to steppin’,” Brandon says, grabbing Paige’s hand. “See you, OJ. We’ll catch up later!”

“See you! Good luck with your tests!” OJ waves.

“Thanks!” both test takers wave back.

Off to the races, then!

+++

Paige walks into Algebra 2 still bogged down by test answers and leaves with a clearer mind. Math was always the same, always an easy pattern to spot, so it helped Paige calm down.

It’s lunchtime now, and Paige is honestly a little wary of entering the place.

You’ll be fine,” Leaf assures, but it’s passive. “Just go in.

What if it’s not fine though?” Paige frets. “What if someone starts asking me questions? What if someone tries to fight me? What it—

Paige is suddenly surprised by A Brotherly Pat On The Back attacking him. “Hey!” Brandon greets.

Paige coughs. “H-ey, Brandon.”

“You ready for lunch?”

Paige nods. …And then shakes his head. “No…” he mumbles. “I’m… I’m honestly kind of scared.”

“Psh!” Brandon laughs. “You’ve got nothing to worry about! Not when your mans is here for you!”

Paige laughs. “Yeah! You’re right!”

“Alright then!” Brandon grins. “Let’s go!” He pulls the both of them into the lunchroom, bursting through the doors with force.

Fortunately for the two of them, everyone else was too busy doing their own things to really notice or care.

“See?” Brandon says with a confident grin. “You’re fine!”

“I’m fine!” Paige repeats with a small laugh.

“Hell yeah! Now, let’s go get somethin’ to eat and chill with the Crew.”

“Yeah!”

The two do just that, lining up and collecting their lunches of tater tots and going to their table.

“H-ey,” Bro greets at the same time Sue says, “Hello you two.”

“Heyo!” Brandon smiles. “Good to see you here today, Sue.”

“Oh?” they hum, eyebrow raising. “And why are we so nice today?”

“Can’t a guy just be happy to see his friend?” Brandon pouts, sitting down along with Paige.

“I suppose,” Sue shrugs. “But I’m watching you, Aguja.”

Paige laughs as Brandon scoffs and rolls his eyes. Same old Sue!

“Here,” Brandon says, ignoring his food in favor of his backpack for a bit. He rummages around until—”Aha!”

“Aha?” Bro asks for the whole table.

Brandon lifts back up with a neatly folded piece of paper in his hands. It’s a nice pastel orange. “Mail’s here!” Brandon grins.

“Ohmygosh!” Paige gasps, proceeding to choke on his tater tot a bit.

Brandon laughs and pats him on the back. “Don’t go dying on me, man! I’d never hear the end of it if he found out I was the reason behind The Death of Paige Woods!” Brandon holds his hands out like he’s reciting the name of a movie or something. It would be endearing if Paige wasn’t still currently coughing up a storm.

After a bit more light pounding of his chest and a gulp of 1% milk, Paige is finally able to accept and read the note from his secret admirer.

The note reads:

“Hello again, Paige! As tests are over, I thought it would be a good time to start writing to you again. I hope my absence has made your heart grow fonder! ♥

Here’s your fun fact of the day: did you know that when you look into your partner’s eyes, your heartbeat and breathing will sync up? It's called interpersonal synchronization. It sounds like something I’d love to try out with you!

(P.S.

I wanted to write something a bit more poetic, but I was afraid it’d come off as phony. Do you like poetry? Should I break out my best for you next time? Please let me know! ♥)”

Paige’s face is red when he finally finishes the note. The handwriting is noticeably higher quality now, like upgrading from scraps of paper and pencils to special sheets of paper and pen did some Cinderella type magic to it.

In fact… it seemed a little familiar…

“Good one today, huh buddy?” Brandon ribs, popping a tot in his mouth. It makes Paige lose his train of thought.

“Are you still reading through my mail?” Paige deadpans.

“You betcha!” Brandon says with a snot nosed grin.

Paige groans. Bro laughs. Sue tries to hold back a snicker, but they’re doing a horrible job of it.

Yep, Paige smiles. Everything’s back to normal. Thank goodness.

+++

When Paige gets home, he does his nightly routine before sitting down at his desk and getting to work. He does all his homework first, making sure it’s out of the way, before sighing and thinking about what he was going to say to his secret admirer after so long.

He grabs a pretty pen he likes (it writes in a nice pink color!) and a light blue and white striped piece of paper before writing down:

“I don’t know much about poetry, but I do like it a lot! I feel like I don’t really have it in me to make it, but I like reading them like they’re little songs. :) So yes, please lay anything you’ve got out on the table! I’m excited to see what you can make for little old me, heehee!

(P.S.

Speaking of music, do you have a favorite genre? I really like pop! Michael Jackson is one of my favorite artists! It’s hard to beat The King, you know!)”

There. Hopefully that was a good start to this whole thing again.

Paige slips the note into his bookbag before climbing into bed and holding Teds tightly, falling into a deep sleep soon after.

+++

Paige is ready to accept the new note on Tuesday, waiting for Brandon to pull it out, when suddenly something smacks him hard upside the back of his head.

“OW!” Paige shouts, turning around.

Oh.

It’s PB and his gang.

PB was one of the more ruthless bullies at Ingenious High, oftentimes bothering people for just existing. The Bro Crew rarely crossed paths with PB, so to see him now, after having been hit by him, was quite the surprise.

“Um…” Paige mumbles, scared.

“Hey!” Bro shouts as Brandon rights himself. “Wh-what do you think y-you’re doing?”

“Oh, look at Mr. Stutter over here,” PB laughs. Bro closes in on himself. “Sorry, but I’m not here for you today.” He looks down at Paige. “Nah, I’m here for this pipsqueak.”

“...Pipsqueak…?” Paige squeaks.

“What’s the big idea, ya big palooka?” Brandon yells, standing up and pushing PB back. Brandon’s short, but stocky. The push has more force than he probably wanted, forcing the other to trip over his own laces and fall flat on his butt. His friends didn’t even try to help.

“Oof!” he groans. “Ugh! What the fuck!?”

Brandon steps closer, looming over PB. “You think it’s funny to hit people for, what exactly?”

“For—help me up, you idiots!” PB spreads his arms out and his two cronies pull him up. He quickly snatches his arms away and dusts himself off. Now he’s the one looming over Brandon, but he doesn’t even flinch.

“I’m waiting for an answer,” Brandon frowns, hands on his hips. “‘Cause let me tell you, I’m not exactly a fan of people hurting my best friend for no good reason.” He pushes one sleeve up and closes his fist. “At all.”

“Brandon, don’t!” Paige wails. “It’s okay, really!”

“No it’s not, Paige!” Brandon says, sounding extremely upset. “I’m not about to stand by and watch you get hurt by some jerkass with issues!”

Jerkass?” PB laughs. “Do you know who I am?”

“No,” Brandon shrugs. “And I don’t care.”

“Well, you’re gonna in a second!” PB assures, getting into Brandon’s face. “I’m your number one nightmare, fucker. I’m gonna be the last thing you think about at night and the first thing you never want to see again in the morning. I’m—”

“Peewee!” a voice breaks in.

Everyone blinks. Then, they turn to look at PB, and then the source of the voice.

It’s Lucy Lulu.

“...Peewee?” one of the goons repeats, only to get hit in the face by PB.

“Shut the fuck up!” he demands, pointing at Lucy afterwards. “And who the hell do you think you’re supposed to be?”

“I’m Lucy!” Lucy grins. “Lulu! Lucy Lulu! And you’re Peewee! Peewee Butter Amber Jones!”

PB flushes immediately and covers his face.

Brandon meanwhile, is laughing up a fit. “P—Peewee?” He looks out of breath. “Butter Amber? God damn, did your parents hate you! Haha!”

Ugh!” PB groans. “What the fuck ever! Shu! Lacie! Let’s get the hell out of here.”

“On it Boss!” Shu says as Lacie nods and says, “You got it, Boss!”

In a flash the group of meanies is gone, each of them grumbling something under their breaths.

Brandon sighs once they’re completely gone, pulling his sleeve back down and slumping a bit. “Ugh. Thanks, Lucy.”

“No problem! Dunno what I did, but I’m always happy to help!” She smiles and rocks back and forth on the heels of her rainboots.

“Is there a reason you’re here, Lucy?” Sue asks as Brandon takes his seat again. “Not that you’re not welcome, it’s just I don’t see you around this part of the cafeteria much.”

Lucy beams. “Yeah, actually! I’ve been tasked with finding out about the hottest gossip in this school in ages!”

“A-and h-ow are we su-supposed to help w-with that?” Bro asks, unimpressed. “W-e don’t really d-do gossip.”

“Oh, that’s easy!” Lucy laughs. “You are the drama!”

What.” all four members of the Bro Crew ask in unison.

“Haha yep!” Lucy moves over to Paige and wraps her entire arm around his neck. “Our little Paigey, head of the school’s newspaper!” She then mock whispers to him, “Nice to see you’re back, by the way!”

“Wh-huh?” Paige blinks.

“Oh, you know!” Lucy giggles. “When you went all ‘we don’t talk much do we?’ on me?”

What?” Paige asks, completely confused. “What does that have to do with me being head of the newspaper or whatever?”

“Oh, thaaaaat,” Lucy chuckles. “Yeah, you’re being interviewed! Right now! By me!”

Interviewed?” Brandon asks. “Why?”

“Duh!” Lucy smiles. “‘Cause Paige fought the scariest kid in the whole school—and won!”







Next up... The Gossip Hour ch 8